I Was Just Thinking…Holding on to get Friday’s paycheck

Older, younger generations set different boundaries for what to tolerate in order to get paid

By Norma Adams-Wade

I’ve been working all week long

Working like a Hebrew slave

… Thank God it’s Friday.

…And when I walk through the door

They got to give me mine

…Now I don’t make that much money

But these bills got to be paid

….You know I ain’t got that much

But it’s Friday (time to get paid)

Song: “It’s Friday…Time to Get Paid”

            Sung by Lee “Shot” Williams

            Written by Floyd Hamberlin

          Important, historic lessons are wrapped up in Friday as payday, particularly in African American and other underserved cultures.

The lessons would be of great benefit to younger generations that might choose to listen.

Mindset, vision, and eyes-on-the-prize goalsetting are the valuable lessons. Lessons taken from what Grampa and Gramma tolerated in their generations in order to make a better life for their children — who now themselves are grandparents.

Historians point to the period that became known as “the great migration” when particularly Black culture began to rise up from menial labor in fields and White households and move on to factories and skilled trade industry. We had to learn the techniques of survival in order to earn pay instead of perform free labor as an enslaved people.

Older generations frequently point out the distinction between their and younger generations’ on-the-job attitudes. Elders describe youngers as impatient, intolerant, and expecting to advance too soon. Youngers are more prone to quit with little provocation and be more defiant with authority. Many elder laborers paid for college expenses for their children who became professional off the nickels and dimes of their laborer parents. Elders would walk away with a paycheck in hand on Friday, which took away the sting of the bad things that happened that week.

Survival techniques, coping mechanisms

Some readers will recall how their parents and grandparents would unwind on Friday evening with paycheck in their pocket. In countless incidents, grampa would stop at the neighborhood beer joint or liquor store on the way home and release pent up emotions through the bottle. Then he would make his way on home, either to eat and sleep or tune out while his spouse preached that he should stop drinking so much on the weekend. That weekend-reprieve was his salvation that enabled him to recharge and face that coming Monday that led to that coming Friday’s paycheck.

Fortunately, drinking away pent up emotions is not always the case. I have one of those frozen memories from earlier  in my career about a hallway encounter with a young Black male on one of my previous jobs. The young man’s on-the-job survival tactic has stuck with me all these years.

We did not know each other but had passed in the hall various times. This particular time, the young man needed a set of ears to vent into and I provided mine. He ranted as we walked along headed in the same direction. He had disagreed with a supervisor’s orders but quietly complied and allowed his frustration to boil. The way he handled his frustration is what has stuck with me all these year. “I can handle this!” he repeatedly declared. “I can do this! I will get through this!”

I saw him a few days later again in the hall. He was in a way better mood and clearly was still on the job. Here’s the message I took away:  Attitude and how one reacts to a situation makes the difference. He survived because of his attitude and how he affirmed his ability to deal with the issue. That coming pay day, he obviously collected a paycheck that enabled him to carry on his life and likely support his family. That’s what our grandparents did, and as a result we, the next generations, have enjoyed the benefits.

Grampa, Gramma, and insurance coverage

People of a certain age will recall their grandparents paying on life insurance policies each week at home. Paying for life insurance was yet another reason why grandparents of those early eras put up with mess at work. That Friday paycheck helped them pay for that life insurance.

Historians say that during the periods of World Wars I and II, weekly insurance installments maybe were a nickel or quarter. Po’ folk often were excluded or did not use traditional banks. Insurance agents would go door-to-door weekly, collecting payments. Some parents would hang the insurance pouch next to the front door with the piddling payment inside and listen for the agent to knock or ring the bell. Again, life insurance was preparation for an inevitable future.

Is Friday worth all that?

A number of you will say “no way” when asked if a Friday paycheck is worth all that. Have the generations changed so much that tolerance is now a relic of the past? Only you can decide the worth of a Friday paycheck and what you will decide to rise above in order to collect it. Yes, the check opens door. You determine whether to walk through that door.

Some lessons

Some lessons to protect Friday paychecks:

• Set your personal limits ahead of time for what you will ignore or tolerate and when you will say “No more.”
• Realize that there are no perfect jobs; that all jobs have an irritating supervisor that you must learn to deal with; that jobs are comprised of people, and to survive on a job, one must learn to deal with people.
• Pick your battles. Every disagreement is not worth your time and attention. Walk away and live to fight another day. That is not to say you become a weenie and lose your dignity. But always display your dignity and self-worth, then others will recognize and respect your boundaries.
• As did the young Black male I mentioned earlier, pick some personal affirmations that will get you through tough situations. Since I have an inbred spiritual foundation, one of my personal affirmations is: “Me and You, Lord. Me and You. I cannot do this alone. And I am never alone”
• Consider how thick is your skin and strive to make it tougher so you will not crumble at mess that is not worth your time and energy. Do not throw in the towel so soon.
• Command your brain to focus on the paycheck and what that check will enable you to acquire; i.e.,  the items you want to purchase, the family members you want to provide for, the bills you need to pay, the financial nest egg you seek to build.
• Keep your eyes on the prize of that Friday paycheck. Our grandfathers did, and it got them the house (although likely very modest), car, food, clothes, mortgage or rent payment, and maybe even the schooling expenses that opened the door for your better life.

Dallasite Norma Adams-Wade is a Texas Metro News senior correspondent, The Dallas Morning News retired writer, and a National Association of Black Journalists founder.